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Dani. Happily married to the love of my life. Camp Pendleton, CA. Sarcasm is my first language. Junk food fanatic. I'm beautiful, fuck you :) k,bye <3

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why am i single i don’t get it i’m great

Because of your run-on sentences.

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growingourlittlefamily:

nataliemeansnice:

loregasmic:

thecakebar:

Chocolate Chip Cookie Peanut Butter S’mores Bars 

…could you repeat that? I couldn’t hear you over the sound of me shooting my fucking load.

FUCK MY MOUTH HOLE WITH THIS OMG

Yep. Screw paleo. This is happening tomorrow.


holdyourorgasm:

http://holdyourorgasm.tumblr.com/

It’s a boy!

violence-of-action:

ivyzillasawrusrex:


&amp; guess who was able to open it WITHOUT breaking it? This guy! *points thumb to nose*
Really feelin’ like this was meant to be. [:
We all know opening these babies without chipping a part of it off is nearly impossible. Aha

I gotta question for you, battle. What the fuck are these things?

Anonymous said: STOP BEING SUCH A CREEPY LADY, YOU CREEPY LADY!

Gimme yo face! :p

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Like fucker, bitch, asshat, and dick :D

bradburythequeen:

i want leonardo dicaprio to be nominated for an oscar for the great gatsby and i want him to win but if he doesn’t, i want him to just go

“No.”

and walk onto the stage, take the statue and walk out completely calmly and everyone else just lets him

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peemilz:

20s baby! &lt;3
You’re an awesome friend..

It’s like one day you flipped a switch and became someone I never knew… So long, farewell… BUT, it’s funny how you now talk to people and try to hang out with them when you used to talk about how much of a slut, how FAT, and ugly they were… Shallow, shallow people. Karma will come around, honey :) and I won’t be there

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thegeorgiaprepster:

lucasbasically:

100% American

😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍
I love my best friend, my lover, my husband.

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